


ADORKABLE

by TheBroken



Category: citrus - サブロウタ | citrus - Saburouta
Genre: Adorkable, Bad Public Behaviour, Canon Lesbian Relationship, Comedy, Crude Humor, Embarrassment, F/F, Gay Panic, Ouch, POV Multiple, Satire, Sex Talk, tmi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:41:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27187423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBroken/pseuds/TheBroken
Summary: Yuzu and Mei go out for an afternoon with Harumi and Matsuri...who generously brings both her trash-talk, jealousy, and her worse behavior!
Relationships: Aihara Mei & Aihara Yuzu
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	ADORKABLE

**Author's Note:**

> Yuzu and Gyaru Mei, with a generous side order of a put upon Harumin with Matsuri at her worse behavior and some fancy footwork by...someone...
> 
> Let's join them now...

"There, Mei! You look like an IDOL - No, better than ANY IDOL!" Yuzu said brightly as she added the finishing touch to Mei's perfect hairstyle. Her beautiful Aspie lover looked up into her eyes, not really knowing what to say as she blushed from the very honest compliment she had been given. But one thing did trouble her...

"Yuzu' she said, 'did you hide that hickey on my neck?" Her blush deepened as she remembered the night before when she had received it, along with several others that weren't apparent...when she was dressed. Yuzu smiled, finishing the braid. No hairspray. Not on that silky mane...

"The scarf, Mei! It's going to hide it!"

Mei wasn't convinced. "What if I get hot, and have to take it off?"

A silly giggle came back with the answer: "Then, you're just going to have to let the world know how HOT I find YOU!" Yuzu looked at her work. Mei really was a knockout in the outfit they had found, very fashionable without being garish, a shade of rich purple that harmonized with her lover's eyes. The dark-haired beauty had insisted on her go-to trademark black leggings, but really, it all held together perfectly.

It was Mei's second outing as a gyaru, the first one having not gone so well as Yuzu had chosen a fast-food restaurant, which was not really her lover's thing. She preferred traditional Japanese food, (Although most deserts were fine for her sweet tooth!) or Italian food. The conversation with Harumi, their companion, had not gone well, either, as it concerned Matsuri, a rather delicate subject for her. As for Mei, she had sat there, staring at the fully dressed, messy hamburger, looking like a gorgeous, life-sized doll, not knowing what to do until Yuzu had saved the day by cutting it up into "Mini burgers" for her to eat...with a fork! Yuzu smiled happily at how DAMNED cute Mei had looked doing that! But this time, she had chosen Italian food, which they both enjoyed. It would be alright for Harumi and Matsuri too, she knew by experience. Since they both were joining them for lunch, the surely difficult conversation they had had must have gone well enough. 

Yuzu was proud as she saw the heads turning in the lovely swath she and her Mei cut as they walked to the restaurant together. Still a little unsure of all this, Mei had started holding her hand halfway through the walk, which put Yuzu squarely on cloud nine. She was slowly overcoming her own awkwardness herself... or at least, not caring as much when she made a social faux pas. Now, what was that word Mei had started using to describe her?...

They found Harumi sitting at a table waiting for everyone to show up, and Matsuri arriving fashionably late 10 minutes later.

"Sorry everyone,' the pink-haired punkster had cooed ludicrously, 'I had to restructure my hair because of all this damned pink dye!" she plopped boorishly down into her seat with her legs sprawled out, picking up a menu after a perfunctory "Hello, all!" and a "Hello, Boob Lady!" (Her baby brother's name for Harumi!) and pretended to peruse it. She couldn't help noticing that her Taniguchi-san was...um...appreciating how well Mei looked as a gyaru. Which pissed her off to the depths of her love-starved, jealous soul. Mei couldn't help noticing out of the corner of her eye either, thinking: "Hmm! Taniguchi has that...let's see, I think it's called the "Suddenly Gay!" look. And judging by how Matsuri is taking it, this could end up badly...I hope we're thru with lunch, first!" That seemed to be the start of the whole thing, anyway. Matsuri meanwhile, let out a frustrated sigh, and, dropping the pretense of looking at the menu, began obviously and rudely staring at Harumi's...assets. "She's already at it! Why in balls...?" the busty auburn-haired girl thought, her attention drawn away from Mei, "And we're in a public place, too! I thought we had an agreement...no, wait! Did she ever promise me anything when we were together the other day? Besides...um, that." Harumi rolled her eyes, and spoke:

"They're not on the menu, Mattie!' Matsuri did not break her longing stare for a second as she said sweetly in return:

"I know, and it's a flat-out God-damned shame, too!" She gave a smack of her lips, "MM MM-MM-MM! Rack of Harumi!" as Taniguchi got one of her rather terrifying looks on her face at that moment, and Yuzu, watching, became very uncomfortable. Weren't those two supposed to be getting on, or getting IT on, or something like that? Why were they starting it, this frigging early in the lunch date? Was this how it was going to be? Harumi had been known to get...physical with Matsuri, and not in a fun way. At least, not in Yuzu's eyes. She really didn't know WHAT was going on between those two, sometimes. She had been losing track of her two best friends, lately; her life with Mei was her main concern, first and foremost. She looked at her dark-haired lover and smiled, and turned to the two miscreants.

"Let's be cool guys, O.K.?" she said firmly. "Matsuri, don't be gross like that to Harumi!" Mei looked over at Matsuri, caught the twinkle in her eyes, shrugged, thinking to herself "I've got a bad feeling about those two... Poor Yuzu! She tries so hard to fix things that love their brokenness." and continued perusing the menu. "Hmm! Maybe the Eggplant Marinara with spaghettoni and a nice salad! Now ...appetizer..." she mused. She felt a sudden warm, and loving touch as her Yuzu surreptitiously squeezed her thigh. Looking Yuzu up and down, Her lover thought: "Hmm. We can do dessert at home later when we're finally alone." Harumi eventually began to key down, Matsuri finally looked over the selections, and Yuzu breathed a sigh of relief so loud that her lover looked up. "I'm alright Mei!" she whispered, and Mei gave her a little smile of encouragement...which caused the blonde to sigh again, even louder, at the sight.

Matsuri crafted a look of sheer luridness on her face, bent over, raised the tablecloth, and made an exaggerated show of looking under the table. "No, ' she said, with her own comically pronounced sigh, 'Mei's other hand is in HER OWN LAP!" She might have said more, but she suddenly yelped in pain.

"Ow! she hissed, "Which one of you bitches kicked me?" she glared at Harumi and Mei, sitting without expression at their places at the round table. "Can't you take a joke, Mei? Or were YOU offended, for God knows what reason, Taniguchi-san? ONE of you is hating on my shin!"

" We're in public, with friends, for Gods' sake! What in the name of ASS has gotten into you, Mattie?" You were cool the other day!" Harumi hissed at her, thinking back to how sweetly that meeting had ended after all of that...tension...that had preceded it. She even tentatively stretched a hand out on the table as a peace offering, which was promptly ignored.

Matsuri grimaced, and held out her own right hand before her face, wiggling her index and middle fingers. "Maybe it's what DIDN'T get into me, Boobalicious!" she whispered angrily. If looks could have killed, the Pink Devil would have been pronounced dead on the spot. "Her frustrations are not something to bring up in front of anyone else, except we two!" Harumi thought as embarrassment colored her features.

Yuzu looked like she wanted to drop off the edge of the world, at the intense TMI of that nasty moment, and Mei reached a comforting hand to her under the table, earning a smile and silently mouthed, "Thank you!" from her lover. As their eyes met in that glance, giving her a brief feeling of calm, Yuzu wondered, how did Mei stay so straight-faced through all of this...ugly bickering, that seemed like some kind of sublimated lovers' quarrel between these two? However she kept so cool, she was grateful for her peaceful presence. She needed to think of something else...like, what WAS that word Mei said had fit her perfectly?

Neither girl would confess to Matsuri's accusation of violent assault, so, after a moment, she shrugged in disgust, and went back to her menu with a vengeance. After a few tense, silent minutes, Yuzu, looking like she was about to break into a cold sweat any moment, broke the silence again.

"O.K. guys, are we all ready to order our beverages?" she flashed her trademark wink and peace sign, and caught the waitresses' attention when everyone nodded "Yes." "I have no-one but myself to blame!' she thought, 'this whole frigging thing was my idea...I should have just stayed at home and cooked for Mei and me, Hell! - I might have even gotten lucky!" She was suddenly aware that Matsuri had caught her looking at Mei as she was thinking that. She well knew by now that her emotions were telegraphed to her face in blatant, day-glow colors, and she began to blush. The little pink Oni, for her part, just leered obscenely and gave Yuzu a thumbs up...just before she let out another squeal of pain.

"Fucker! That's my leg you're tenderizing, whoever is doing that.' She looked around the table. "I didn't say shit just then! Stop it, or give me a sonofabitch safe word, and KISS ME, because I demand to be kissed when I have ANY kind of sex, you Goddamn SADIST! So help me, ONE MORE KICK, and I'm..."

Harumi interrupted her tirade: "You're on crack! We're embarrassing Yuzu and Prez! Get your mind out of the gutter!" The younger girl leaned across the table, and stated in a matter-of-fact way, "I can't, it's attached to my body!" "Get out of my grill..." Harumi began, but at that moment the waitress came up, and the badly ruffled pinkette settled into giving her gruff drink order, grumbling under her breath. Harumi's and Mei's faces were unreadable masks, even to an expert like Matsuri. She honestly couldn't tell who was the culprit. But it wasn't Yuzu. She would have been too embarrassed.

The waitress had left to put in the drink orders for the girls, as Matsuri wasn't decided on her entree' yet when Harumi caught Matsuri...staring yet again. Crudely. Deliberately. Blatantly. Jesus! This was crazy! She had been fine when they were together the other day. She THOUGHT they had hashed things out. Was Matsuri actually getting off on the abuse, or what? Whatever reason the pink brat had decided to act up, she wasn't going to take her messed-up antics! Mei saw her winding up again and settled back in resignation to watch the incident play out. "This is hopeless!" she thought. "We're going to be thrown out, and banned from this nice place forever, possibly even before our entrees arrive!"

"Why don't you take a picture of them, Mattie? It'll last longer!" Harumi sneered. Matsuri rose to the bait, and poor Yuzu wished she could melt thru the seat. "Oh, Harumi,' she crooned, 'MAY I?" she pulled out her smartphone as her angry target clenched her fists. Yuzu groaned in anguish and mortification. She shot a warning look to Matsuri, who at least put the phone away. What an evil turn this had taken! There was surely going to be a murder occurring any moment now, the victim a certain cute, but obnoxious pink-haired girl, who literally couldn't shut up to save her life!

"I thought they were getting along!" she whispered in Mei's ear, causing the girl to blush and let out a small moan as Yuzu's lips had brushed one of her major erogenous zones. "Oh, God, I'm sorry, Mei!" she mumbled, her hands going to her face in a gesture of shock.

"MMMM! YOU GO, GIRLS! YO, PARTY TIME!" said Matsuri, just before she yelped again, grabbing her leg and groaning; "Safeword is "BOOBS", BEE-AITCHES!" just as the waitress came with the drinks.

" Have you decided what to order?" the waitress asked, a slightly distressed look on her face.

Yuzu, nearly in a fugue of humiliation, blurted out the first thing her churning and embarrassed mind could come up with:

"BOOBS!" she said, loud enough to be heard by every table around them.

Her nervous smile collapsed as she buried her face in her hands, tears coming to her eyes as she prayed for the bullet that would never arrive, she felt her lover's arm go around her shoulders in a vain attempt at comfort as Mei finally lost her own composure, shooting a cold, dangerous look at the other girls. She reflected, however, that she'd be happy spending a lot more alone time with Yuzu for some while, if not always, after this fiasco!

And right at that moment, as Matsuri's mad laughter rang out in her haunted ears, Harumi lunging across the table for her throat, Yuzu lost it and went to her mental happy place, at last, recalling that word Mei had used to describe her:

"ADORKABLE."

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, all! I hope you got a good laugh...This story is actually just a satire on some of the Fanfictions I've enjoyed, and is in NO WAY a part of ANYONE'S known canon!


End file.
